Couple/Do not confuse pleasure and orgasm

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Extract from the article: We talk a lot about sex, but many confuse pleasure and orgasm as they confuse 'I ate' with 'I ate well'. Being well does not necessarily mean having enjoyed. And lasting for a long time does not guarantee anything either. As explained by Professor Da

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We talk a lot about sex, but many confuse pleasure and orgasm as they confuse 'I ate' with 'I ate well'. Being well does not necessarily mean having enjoyed. And lasting for a long time does not guarantee anything either. As explained by Professor Dantola Paul Kain, gynecologist-obstetrician (Burkina Faso), it is not the duration that counts. Lasting forty minutes without an orgasm is like driving for a long time without ever reaching your destination.

At the woman’s place, pleasure does not arrive without warning. It settles in. At first he is there, then the body relaxes, the breathing changes, the head slowly empties. She doesn’t need to talk, her body shows that she likes it. The pleasure rises gradually. She feels good, sometimes very well. She can sigh unintentionally, guide, say what she likes, adjust the rhythm. At this point, some think "it’s good", while madam is just warming up.

When the orgasm arrives in the woman, breathing accelerates. She feels that something is happening, without always being able to explain it. Then the body takes over. The pelvis contracts with small twitches, the vagina and the uterus tighten, the body can tremble. Sounds come out uncontrolled. "ohhh..." , "ahhh..." sometimes a "haaaan..." louder than expected. At that moment, the hands too can become uncontrollable. Some cling to the sheets, others to the shoulders, and it happens that the nails come out without warning. The scratches are not a warning signal, but proof that the pleasure has overflowed from the frame. For about fifteen seconds, she no longer controls anything. Then everything descends. The body relaxes, the breathing calms down.

Professor Paul Kain insists on a point that many ignore. Vaginal lubrication is a sign of excitement, not a sign of orgasm. A woman can be very lubricated without having cum.

In men, reading is often simpler. When excitement arrives, the penis becomes hard and pleasure rises little by little. He can still control, slow down, speed up. Then comes a very clear moment. He feels the sperm coming. His body begins to react on its own. It grows at the bottom, the sex contracts without him deciding. He understands that it’s there, that it’s launched and that he can no longer stop. At that moment, the body takes over completely. The lower body contracts several times and the sperm comes out. For a few seconds, he no longer controls anything. He breathes heavily, blows a lot, sometimes a sound comes out without him wanting to. He becomes like someone crossed by the current. He squeezes, he grabs, he pulls without thinking. Beware of wigs for those who wear them, because in this uncontrolled momentum, everything that is poorly fixed is in danger. It is not violence, it is pleasure that overflows and exceeds the body.

In men, argues Professor Kain, this moment corresponds to ejaculation. It is their orgasm. Once past, in many men, the motivation quickly falls away. It is said that "the match is over".

In women, it’s different. Orgasm does not always mark the end. Some feel like stopping, others can continue. For many, excitement does not suddenly fall off. The body remains receptive. Some can even chain several orgasms or remain excited after the first one

Pleasure and orgasm do not tell the same story. Pleasure can settle, last, do good, make you want to continue. Orgasm, on the other hand, happens when the body decides to let go, often briefly, sometimes loudly, sometimes without warning. One can love what happens without reaching that moment. In bed, it’s not just about prolonging the pleasure, but understanding what the body is waiting for to go further. That’s often where everything happens.

Jean ELI (Source: Bulletin Santé)